I was walking home from class tonight, praying. I recently put in my application for a couple of positions with some firms that I think I’d really enjoy working for, at least in some regards…no job’s perfect, right?! Anyway, I was praying about these opportunities and I found myself praying, “Lord, if you’re willing, let me get a positive response, and interview, and job offer quickly, so that we’ll have something firm on which to stand and make plans…” And before I had finished the sentence, I realized my idolatry. On what do I stand? According to whose will do I make plans, and live, and move, and have my being? On Christ alone, I stand.
Having a job offer soon would afford me the opportunity to get some things lined up nice and neat. It would take some pressure off of our transition time at the end of my studies in mid-May. In the eyes of the world, it would be something solid on which to build. But, that is shifting sand. Yes, when I think of not having an answer from the Lord soon on a job, and not being able to make concrete plans, buy tickets, plan time back stateside, etc…though I feel shaken through and through, only in waiting for Him am I really on solid ground. Now, He might provide soon or late. He has done both in the past. I cannot dictate timing to Him. I can pray. I can walk in diligence, trying doors to see what might be open in His sovereignty. But, I must rely on Him and not the open door. I must plan according to His faithfulness, not according to a job offer.
God knows how to care for me. He knows that I feel the need for rest. But, rest won’t come through a quick job offer, but through finding my rest in God. He knows that I am weary with uncertainty, but solid ground is found in pressing near to Him and in nothing else. All the reasons that I want a quick answer on the job hunt area: stability, rest, planning, provision, etc…He has already said, “I will provide those things, and apart from me, they do not exist.”
Pray that I would look to Him for these things. Pray that Meg and I would both find these needs fulfilled in seeking Him out and resting in Him, in being yoked to Him whose yoke is easy and burden is light!